Disclaimer: This post is kind of braggy and whiny.
When I was in third grade (I think?) I remember going into the library at whatever school I was attending (Fort Polk/Leesville, LA) and being given a test. It was a test to see if I could get into the gifted and talented program. I don’t remember the person who gave me the test, the questions on the test, or my end score. I did not “pass” this test. And I remember wondering which questions I got wrong, how I could have taken the test differently to have done better. I don’t know that I felt that way in third grade (the sadness at not passing) but I did in later years, sometimes thinking, “If they’d just let me take it again, I know I’d do better!” ( am very competitive, especially in grades, and always wanted to do better then I had the time before)
Anyway, Brennan was tested for gifted a few years back. This kid scored perfect or nearly perfect on his state math exam. (I think 100%, but maybe 99%?), prompting the testing. Anyway, he did amazing and he got in. He LOVES this class/program and he has really excelled being in a group of 4 white and nerdy kids, learning and being challenged.
Jackson just got the letter sent home yesterday. He did very well on his initial tests and they’d like to exam him further, to see if he qualifies to be in the “challenge class” and maybe gifted and talented program. He was SO excited, too! He kept talking about the cool things Brennan had done, saying he hoped he was able to do some of the things Brennan had done before we move.
While this test excites me, it also makes me nervous…he’s seen how very cool the program is. He wants to do the things his brother does…what if he is given the same testing opportunity and doesn’t quite make the cut? I know he will be fine…he’s a smart kid with a huge heart. But,I still pray he “passes” the exam, because I don’t want to have to see him sad, even for a little while. I’ve had enough “sadness” from Mr. Ethan every day at school drop off! I can’t take more child tears. It beaks my heart.
So, this post isn’t to brag, promise…….whether it is nature or nurture that these boys of mine seem to be Mr. Smarty Pants, I am happy for them, excited to see them excel…but my mama heart doesn’t want for Jackson wonder if he could have just done a little better. (p.s. that article made me laugh. a lot. it’s sort of dumb, but also funny)….And hey, if my kids have above average intelligence and become the rulers of multi-million dollar corporations, who am I to deny myself a spot on the board of directors, along with a fat pay check and company car.